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No-coparenting, ..

Hi All,

Need some help from the Pro’s! I am a divorced father with a 6 year old son, my ex left and moved out and filed for divorce when our son was 9 months old. Fast forward 5 years, I have had 4 attorneys and spent 70k to fight for my son. I am an excellent loving, nurturing Father however his Mom resents me and refuses to co-parent with me.

My ex has told me she refuses to work with me because I am narcissistic. I am very nice to her, I bend over backwards and always take the high road when it comes to our son. I have our son 4 nights and 3 days every week of the month except one, it’s like a 47%/53% split. She has played the victim card for years, calls herself a single mom despite working part-time and living off child support. She filed bankruptcy last year over 14k of debt.

Long story short I don’t view my time as my time and hers as hers, I think about our son’s needs. She will take him to his grandparents two hours away vs letting him stay with his Dad for example. Lately my son has been asking to see me while with her, and she always tells him no and my son is upset.

I have asked her to put his needs first and to let him see me but she refuses. I am worried about our son growing up and hating her or resenting her. I also don’t know how to handle this with my son. Do I encourage him and say it’s Ok to ask to see me despite her refusal to do so? Do I protect him and tell him that’s time with his mom, don’t ask to see your Dad. That seems wrong to me.

I was hoping the resentment would pass 5 years later, but it hasn’t. I wasn’t husband of the year but I am an excellent father. It is an odd world to live in wanting a co-parenting relationship with his Mom for him and she refuses.

A good example of this is we travel a good bit, I will send her pics of him. She doesn’t say is he having a good time, what are his favorite rides, thanks for the pics or nothing.

I hate this for our son, as I know it’s going to lead to conflict. She claims I am just making her the bad guy by making it ok for him to ask to see me knowing how she feels.

How do I go through all this and protect my son when I am super open to co-parenting and she totally refuses?

Thanks..

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